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How to report sexual harassment

What is the best way for an employee to report sexual harass fettywap04/11/18
Show them on a doll where a bad man touched you? triplesix04/11/18
So I should draw two stick figure people and show him bent o fettywap04/11/18
You might need to speak to an employment lawyer lol This triplesix04/11/18
"I don't know that I want to list out every fact and instanc dingbat04/11/18
Darn. That's going to take a long time. fettywap04/11/18
if you present irrefutable evidence, they can't refute you dingbat04/11/18
The question is: was he smoking near you at the time? trollfeeder04/11/18
Was it real sexual harassment or did he just make an unwante isthisit04/11/18
Well like I said, it will be a long complaint and he's been fettywap04/11/18
Beause dudes who never got laid younger think that being a m triplesix04/11/18
Some women will view an ugly guy looking at them as being ey isthisit04/11/18
If you have to ask, you can’t understand dingbat04/12/18
If I have to ask it's so that I can understand. isthisit04/12/18
quite simple - yes, there are a few people who are completel dingbat04/12/18
does your boss bear more resemblance to Tom Brady or to Harv williamdrayton04/11/18
Well he's the same age as me and not really fat. This is the fettywap04/11/18
I had a HR manager grab my butt one time and I didn’t file bizzybone131304/11/18
Snarky comments upthread aside, in today's environment, any bazinga04/11/18
What do you want him fired or to just stop? Fired you need 2ski04/11/18
As dingbat mentioned above, you want to write out every inst kickflipninja04/11/18
Yes I'm a woman. All of our files are electronic. I noticed fettywap04/11/18
Assuming this isn’t troll bait, have a complaint submitted qdllc04/12/18
If you haven’t already, regardless of what you decide to d pisces21304/12/18

fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 10:41 am)

What is the best way for an employee to report sexual harassment/discrimination? I guess I should do it in writing, but I don't know that I want to list out every fact and instance I can think of when I complain. So what exactly should I put in writing to give the employer notice?

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triplesix (Apr 11, 2018 - 10:42 am)

Show them on a doll where a bad man touched you?

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fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 10:53 am)

So I should draw two stick figure people and show him bent over in my crotch. K.

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triplesix (Apr 11, 2018 - 11:01 am)

You might need to speak to an employment lawyer lol

This sounds like an assault, not harrasment.

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dingbat (Apr 11, 2018 - 11:26 am)

"I don't know that I want to list out every fact and instance I can think of when I complain"

You do want to list out every fact and instance, preferably with date, time, and corroborating witnesses. you want as much detail as possibe.

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fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 11:30 am)

Darn. That's going to take a long time.

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dingbat (Apr 11, 2018 - 1:00 pm)

if you present irrefutable evidence, they can't refute you

if you stroll in saying "he made a mean comment" without any more detail, it won't go anywhere. Don't forget, they need evidence to discipline him, and if you don't provide it, they don't have any

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trollfeeder (Apr 11, 2018 - 1:41 pm)

The question is: was he smoking near you at the time?

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isthisit (Apr 11, 2018 - 2:16 pm)

Was it real sexual harassment or did he just make an unwanted pass at you?

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fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 2:34 pm)

Well like I said, it will be a long complaint and he's been hostile to me since did it. Is that how the men make passes at women these days? Why should my boss be making a pass at me?

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triplesix (Apr 11, 2018 - 2:39 pm)

Beause dudes who never got laid younger think that being a middle manager would make you moist. They don't understand the term 'power' haha

Poo lawyers are the worst offenders, they hire women to sexually harass them. and if these poor women don't comply, they show them "who's the boss"

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isthisit (Apr 11, 2018 - 6:46 pm)

Some women will view an ugly guy looking at them as being eye-raped. But if the dude is handsome than she feels complimented.

I'm trying to understand what the scenario is here.

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dingbat (Apr 12, 2018 - 8:54 am)

If you have to ask, you can’t understand

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isthisit (Apr 12, 2018 - 12:52 pm)

If I have to ask it's so that I can understand.

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dingbat (Apr 12, 2018 - 5:25 pm)

quite simple - yes, there are a few people who are completely nuts. But they're very few and far between. Just assume it's legit.

(unless there are other clues; if this had come from a certain poster who I shall not name but is frequently asking about bar admission and mental health issues, then it makes total sense to ask such a question)

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williamdrayton (Apr 11, 2018 - 4:57 pm)

does your boss bear more resemblance to Tom Brady or to Harvey Weinstein?

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fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 5:11 pm)

Well he's the same age as me and not really fat. This is the guy that was married to a stripper on meth 20 years ago and still whines that she left him. So, he can't even get working girls to have sex with him.

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bizzybone1313 (Apr 11, 2018 - 5:28 pm)

I had a HR manager grab my butt one time and I didn’t file a complaint. And I really should have— because with her ultra ugly face- she was delusional to think I as a handsome, young strapping 21 YO was gonna sleep with her busted 35 YO self. She was atrocious. I told my 3/4 black-1/4 Asian GF at the time and she didn’t get mad. I have slept with plenty of older women, but this one was atrocious.

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bazinga (Apr 11, 2018 - 6:51 pm)

Snarky comments upthread aside, in today's environment, any kind of sexual harassment in the workplace is going to be taken much more seriously than in the past and even minor events could lead to discipline or a firing. So if it bothers you, there's no reason to be hesitant to deal with it out of the fear that it will be brushed off. The main concern is how to deal with it and what your goal is in terms of the behavior simply ceasing, the offender being brought to justice, etc.

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2ski (Apr 11, 2018 - 9:47 pm)

What do you want him fired or to just stop? Fired you need a complete file with facts. Or, you could tell him very privately, 'Stop now, apologize, and I won't share my giant file with HR. Your call.' So yes, it is blackmail.

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kickflipninja (Apr 11, 2018 - 10:09 pm)

As dingbat mentioned above, you want to write out every instance with dates, time, context, what happened including quotes/dialogue.

If any coworkers know about this or may have observed any unusual behavior/comments, list them as corroborators.

There may be or may have been other sexual harassment/assault reports filed on him from other women. Are you a woman?

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fettywap (Apr 11, 2018 - 10:18 pm)

Yes I'm a woman. All of our files are electronic. I noticed today that some of what we were arguing about this week is deleted from the file.

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qdllc (Apr 12, 2018 - 7:30 am)

Assuming this isn’t troll bait, have a complaint submitted by a third party. Preferably an attorney. If you are fired or demoted post complaint, it is presumed to be retaliation, but so many have been burned because the employer denies ever getting a complaint and it’s the accuser’s word against the employer. A lawyer will file the complaint and have the paper trail proving when and how the employer was noticed.

Some advocate joint filing with state/federal EEO agencies so the date is set on all levels, but the key is to prove the employer was noticed on the complaint and when.

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pisces213 (Apr 12, 2018 - 8:29 am)

If you haven’t already, regardless of what you decide to do next, write down everything you remember with as much detail as possible.

After that, you probably want to consult with someone who can give you advice and help you through whatever it is that you want to do.

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